What has been or is your complaint(s) about your family members? What is the story you tell yourself and your friends about family members? How long have you been telling this same story or a similar version?
You may find yourself with complaints along the lines of: they don't care or respect me, they keep doing this all the time, they don't change (neither do you when you complain about the same thing!) they don't listen or understand me, they don't love me, they keep misbehaving, they don't do as they are told, they keep screaming or shouting, they are not obedient, they have (fill in the blank).
As some of this is familiar, write out your story or complaints, one family member at a time and after you have finished ask yourself if you are willing to do any of the following:
Are you willing to stop complaining about some of what you have written about? If your story has nine parts to it would you be willing to stop telling the same story about 5 parts?
Are you willing to make your story about what you want with your family and relationships, make sure this doesn't involve someone else changing.
If you need to keep telling the same story next year as you have for the past days, weeks months or years, are you at least willing to add to the story or complaint some appreciation or good qualities about the family member concerned?
If you are unwilling to change anything can you at least accept responsibility and admit now you are the one doing this to yourself and ask what you enjoy about beating yourself up year after year?
Plenty of choices to choose from, next year can be different and better and you can have a better relationship with others. If you can be diligent in maintaining your new choice most of the time (this gives you room to slip) it will not be long before you see signs of your reward.
Working with clients over the years I have seen miracles happen and relationships that were destined for turmoil, divorce, separation are much better. It is possible!!!
