Part of the new Abraham book is devoted to creating harmony in the household, specifically parents and the children and chores around the house. This brought back memories for me and a recognition of what was going on in our childhood home.
Like a lot of households there was a lot of resistance to chores, even with a weekly pocket money allowance there was resistance. Where could that have come from?
Well I thought back to things that where there was no resistance, where there was joy and fun cleaning up etc. One thing was obvious, we all enjoyed helping my mother when she was baking and cooking, whether it was mixing things, cleaning up, carrying or fetching it was all fun. Baking and cooking was fun for my mother too, she really loved to do it, she was smiling, good body language etc.
As children we observe things very closely we can tell when someone is happy or sad, annoyed or frustrated and we make those connections very quickly. As happy as my mother was cooking and baking, she was unhappy, doing dishes, polishing shoes and cleaning up around the house.
Observing this and making the connections that there was something unhappy about this task, when it came to being asked to do these chores, I was resistant. At that age, not having done the task before, why would there, be resistance? I had made the connection that this wasn't going to be fun, that had been my experience and observations. I say that not to blame my mother, I was just making connections. Later those chores were associated with punishment which created more resistance.
I know today that this is not uncommon in a lot of households and it does cause a lot of problems for all concerned. What is the answer? I would suggest for parents to be aware of how they are feeling at all times, you are being watched, very closely! As Abraham suggests before you do anything, get in the vortex, alignment or feel good before you do anything. If the task feels too big then break it down into smaller pieces or do a little at a time so you can maintain your feeling of happiness.
Things will change quickly and you will notice that those around you will want to help out. We all wanted to help with baking and cooking, not so much cleaning dishes. It is possible to feel good doing anything, if you are willing to feel good and not stuck in resistance. It is natural for us to want to do things that feel good, so you can have great influence on those around you, if you choose that path.
Interestingly we also have the power to influence those around us in the opposite direction too. We then have a choice of how we wish to influence. What is your choice?